My last post on soulmates came just about as close as it could get without being ultra personal.. Truth is I once thought I had a soulmate who I thought I had finally gotten over. Talking with someone over the weekend however rudely awakened me to the fact that I had not!
Di checked all my boxes – not just in a physical way. Warm and bubbly, super spiritual without coming across as obnoxious, intelligent, able to discuss on anything from calculus to zoology and with a really mature head on her shoulders, it looked like it was chemistry on steroids. Plus we were good friends for 20+ years….
Unfortunately we were on different timelines. I had a five year plan that had me getting my dream job at 22 and hooking up at 26. However a succession of ASUU strikes and my SUG President friend combined to throw my plans out of line- plus I had a wee bit of doubt and played all kinds of scenarios in my mind (RocNaija called it analysis paralysis). Long and short, I didn’t commit and after hanging on for moi – she was snapped up by another dude. I reacted like a petulant teenager — morose for several weeks (was on vacation at the time), started my first anger filled blog (which i eventually deleted), cut off all communication, and basically tried to forget it. It hurt too that I got to hear by a YahooIM!
Until this weekend though I believed I had lived it down, until I was forced to remember it all again… Walking through the issues in my head, I’ve finally realized that I didn’t have a divine right to her heart and if i didn’t commit she was very free to move on…Finally I can say I’ve truly forgotten it..I still do not intend to get chuumy though… Better to be safe than sorry as they say!
Personally, I think there are several people we can connect with on multiple levels — not just one….And how well we connect depends on how much effort we are willing to put into it to make it work…….
Edit: LoloBloggs has a different slant on why dudes fail to commit…… Read it here…. Thanks for sharing…